Friday, March 9, 2018

Older women more likely to have sex on the first date

Older women have been around the block, and aren't expecting as much from a relationship.

Many of them are not looking for commitment and marriage, they just want to have a good time.
In a recent study when it came to the question of having sex on a first date if there was chemistry, 17 percent of the 20 somethings said that was a possibility versus 28 percent of the over 30 women  and 30 percent of the over 40 women. Older women are a better bet for first date sex.

If the first thing you thought was, “Really? I thought younger girls were throwing it around like confetti,” you and me both. With the background noise of hook-up culture, sexting, friends with benefits, and the Duke Sex List it’s easy to think that younger women are pretty sexually aggressive… that is, if pop culture is your main source of information.

older blonde woman sitting on bed
Older woman sitting on bed in black evening dress

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The fact is that they do have other influences besides those mentioned above. Kylstra offered some additional thoughts via email on why young women are more conservative than one might imagine.

Girls in their twenties, she offers, are still close enough with family and friends to consider their opinions important; indeed, in the story it notes that the dating site OKCupid found that “my girlfriends” is the most common phrase used by straight women in their profiles and “close with my mother” is in the top 20. If mom or the BFFs don’t approve of jumping into bed, she might be less likely to rush it . . .

over 40 woman laying on bed in bra and panties
Mature woman in tan bra laying on bed
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Kylstra also notes a study from the University of Texas at Austin which shows that women in the middle age group of 27-45 (the other groups were 18-26 and 45+) thought about and had more sex and “are more willing to engage in sex after knowing a partner for either one month, one week or one evening,” according to Tom Jacobs who wrote about the study for Miller-McCune. The researchers think this is a response to declining fertility, but also noted it can simply be that older women are more comfortable with sex.

Older women – that’s 'older' since 40's is still young to me – are clearer about what they want and what they don’t,” says psychotherapist Isadora Alman, whose sex and relationship advice column “Ask Isadora,” has been running in various outlets for 25 years. “Older women also may be looking for good sex since they may have had enough of the other kind,” she says.

Mature blonde woman
Blond older woman in black dress
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And with screaming orgasms in mind we must, of course, address the "cougar,” an older-woman image that has become a caricature. “Everyone’s using the word cougar and it’s gotten a bad rap,” says LA Talk Radio’s Lucia, a sex and relationships expert who recently launched Cougar Dating.

As for the supposedly common knowledge that men are biologically driven to seek younger, more fertile women, it may be common, but it may not be knowledge, but rather, preference. Some men, Lucia says, “are thinking 'Even though I’m programmed to want to be with someone fertile my attraction is to someone older,' and so they’re choosing to go with their attraction rather than their programming.”

“We’re brought up to think (men) want youth …why would they want an older woman? Luckily, men aren’t as shallow as that,” she says, and cites confidence, experience, and freedom from drama among the draws of the mature female . . .

older woman wanting men
Older woman sitting in car showing her white lace panties
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Whether it’s that distant call of our '70s youth, our biological clocks, or our gratifying comfort with ourselves, we older ladies are pretty sexually aggressive. We may not all be cougars…but we can be tigresses . . .

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